Benny
Someone read tarot cards for me who told me to have a soulmate. It was of course up to me to decide who that could be. However, I had never thought about it, heard about it, but never thought that I could have it. Have I met my friend at a time and place where I normally could not have been or had been … coincidence? or destiny?
There was and is a huge attraction
I had no partner at the time, not for years
It happened to me the moment I met him, it was stronger than myself and I saw it as a leap in the dark. Being together is very blissful in any way, even though I discovered for myself that I could feel and experience love (back). A lot of emotions, cried and felt pain, thinned … But together with him without tensions, stress … just that good feeling … a feeling of coming home … a feeling of that is what I want … but above all a feeling to learn with my own feelings to to go. I had a hard time emotionally and yet knowing that it was not because of him but just because of myself … not being able to deal with my deepest self … realizing that that good feeling that I feel goes very deeply, deeper than I realize, to the depths of my being …
The attraction that we both felt was expressed in a sexual relationship, being together that way was blissful and quite intense, respectful and valuable. That good feeling that brought us together was enormously strong but what is certain is a huge friendship between the two of us … loving … each probably in his own way
Obstacles were influenced by situations, but according to my thinking and feeling, he has a hard time being so emotional and he gives me the courage to temper this, put it into perspective and accept it and take into account what can and cannot be done
The love relationship has come of itself, without difficulty without hesitation … At the moment we have very little sex with each other but that is also not the most important thing in a relationship … Have let him know my feelings for him, let me know how deeply I am in it go and that I let myself come over (tired of fighting against myself, just being my own in my feeling) He did not cancel much there just that moment when a relationship can arise even though she has only 0.5% succeed , then you have to go for it. His slogan is “leave what is good, good a good wine does not need a wreath”. It took a long time before I could understand what he meant by this, but gradually it dawns on me and it is also my support to continue …
Especially a special friendship in which we consciously or unconsciously complement each other in sometimes very small details. I support him through thick and thin, I shared joy with him but also intense sadness, his sadness that I felt like mine … Do everything possible for him, I am a giver not a taker … I give and I am grateful, very grateful that he is there and that I got to know him … and that I can give him so much without taking out of respect and a huge appreciation that I have for him and he for me … He does not say it in so many words but let it feel in small things that I become aware of afterwards …
I assume that it is soul love, and what has brought me is that I still have to get to know myself and deal with myself. Always thought or expected that you would find certainty and appreciation in a relationship. But now I know that the certainty and the appreciation lie with me , I already have that … but knowing that there is someone who wants to share a lot with you and that you can allow that … I call that accessibility and gives me a secure feeling, knowing that he is there perhaps to a lesser extent than I am for him but that is not necessary … we are two different people with different feelings and way of thinking …
I am happy that I can share such a deep friendship with someone without making an effort … it comes from itself… it comes from my heart … Didn’t even know in the past that this was possible … I have become a different person and have realized that I spent a lot of time with myself, crying and alone and still feel good in my being alone that I can share with another, give it space and yet realize that happiness lies with me … I often wondered if I should follow my mind or my heart … Have decided to follow my heart … whatever it may be … thinking does not take you further, it only blocks you … I have overcome my fears and my biggest fear was to be who and what I am. Now know that I am who and what I am, do not have to be someone else, have made peace with that …
The most special thing was the meeting itself … realizing that we meant something to each other … that we gave each other courage and peace to continue in this life … The good feeling that we had no trouble at all, just let it happen and let it happen … inspire each other and give courage … consciously or unconsciously … know that there is someone who cares
Eroticism was different, a deep longing for each other, an enormous attraction … and blissful feeling (must also say that this is also the first time for me that I am in a relationship with a man, don’t get me wrong I have known others but not in a relationship or whatever)
The soul love feeling is like a very deep feeling, so deep and special that you can’t really describe it or turn it into words. It is because of that deep feeling that I experience that I ended up here on this website, because I want to know why these feelings are so deep and everything that goes with them … find an answer.
I had a lot of problems in allowing those feelings for myself because they were unknown in my existence, I wanted to let them go, let them go but they are so strong that I can’t, which makes it even more difficult for me because I went that I had everything under control, certainly myself and I had decided that I no longer have feelings for or towards others and then comes across with this … a feeling that is so deep that I feel in my belly, no butterflies, but pain because I could not place them …
We are still in a relationship, just that there has been no sex for a while … think we are having a hard time … separating the intense and profound friendship from a sexual relationship … The friendship is too important, neither of them makes a choice and does not make a decision … anything is possible, nothing must … give each other space …
Soul love happens to you … just … I have never been searching … it happened to me
Sometimes I still have a hard time, although the emotional aspect is going well for the time being … but for the moment I have physical complaints that are probably due to my being emotional. Have always been afraid that someone might break me, but now realize that I am or was breaking myself through my emotions. Don’t worry at all. I know that it is difficult for my friend, but by reacting in such a way that I have to convert my negative feelings into positive ones … I am going to succeed, but especially because of his support and friendship … Glad I can and may experience this … Make it myself especially difficult … but have the feeling that it will be all right, have known him for almost 2 years now … has a meaning or am I kidding myself … don’t think I will go for it!
My tip is: Follow your heart and your feelings … everything else is not important, your mind will not help you, not even society or others around you …
Be yourself, stay who you are … go for it … it’s a experience in itself no matter how it ends, but a deep feeling as I feel it does not end … it lives on